Wednesday, January 13, 2010

I didnt think it was physically possible, but this both sucks and blows

Okay I just need to get a couple things off my chest:

Fuck Jay Leno

Fuck NBC

Yeah. I dropped the f-bombs. I cannot put into words how unbelievably angry I am for what they did to Conan. 7 months? They only gave him 7 months? Jay Leno's ratings bit the big one when he took over "The Tonight Show", but they gave him a couple years to settle in and he is terrible! Literally terrible in every way. It saddens me that people I'm related to actually think he's entertaining. Also, I totally used to think he was a good guy. Unfunny and outdated, but a good guy. Now it turns out he's also a first rate jerk. For years I waited patiently for Conan to finally get his turn. And they gave him 7 months. Disgusting.

Please another station hire him!! I need him on my television!!

Conan, I pledged my eternal devotion to you back in the 90's when you first took over "Late Night". You're the most talented comedian on television today, and I love you and will follow you wherever you go! I mean you ended your press release with "I am truly sorry about my hair; it’s always been that way." You are amazing. I love you!

Okay sorry that had to be said. The rage has been building up inside of me. Oh by the way the title of my post is a quote by Bart Simpson, and it 100% applies to this situation.

My favorite conversations from when we went to visit my grandparents on Saturday:

1. Scene: The family is discussing the Tiger Woods saga mostly because my grandma hates Tiger Woods. Her glee at his predicament is palpable. And hilarious.

Family member: Well he's kind of disappeared. No one's really seen him since all these girls started coming out of the woodwork.
My near-90 year old grandpa: He's just busy lining up a new batch.


2. McDonald's bathroom. My mom has just come out of the stall and is washing her hands. The girl from the other stall who we don't know is also washing her hands. My mom is going to order our food while I go to the bathroom. The girl in the bathroom does not know that.

My mom, immediately after I go into the stall and sit down on the toilet: Sarah...number 2?
Me, quickly: No mustard or onions.
[pause]
Me: Mom, don't yell out number 2 in the bathroom.
Mom and stranger girl immediately bust out into sidesplitting laughter, and stranger girl expresses relief that we were talking about food.


3. Scene: Sitting in my grandparents' living room discussing our various travel horror stories. We begin discussing how my Grandpa gets pulled aside and searched every single time he goes through the security line at the airport.

My mom: Well Dad gets searched every time he goes through security. Last time he got searched going there and back. Because he looks so dangerous.
My grandma: Yes. On the way home they made him take his clothes off. Remember that, dear? You had to go into a room.
My uncle: Yeah that's right-they strip searched you!
Me, in disbelief: WHAT! They strip searched you, Grandpa!?
My almost 90 year old grandpa: They just wanted to see my manly body.

I love my family.

6 comments:

Peggy said...

Amen sister on the Leno thing!!!!!!!!

ps...long time reader first time replier (I think). You make me chuckle

mollyCLE said...

I Know!! I really hate Jay Leno! Go away already! His show is lame and bland I can't believe its even an issue!!

Erratic said...

I am livid about the Conan thing. LIVID. Jay Leno is a douche. And, go Conan for refusing to take the back seat to him.

Fizzgig said...

ha ha ha ha your mom said #2...awesome!

allijag said...

I'm so with you on the NBC thing - I loathe them, and adore Conan!

Yummerson said...

I just blew a snot bubble laughing at #2 at McDonald's! Priceless! The McDonald's not the snot bubble.