Thursday night Steph, Meg, Diane and I went out to a bar for charity. I know it sounds fake, but for real we really went for the charity. I mean obviously we got there 3 hours early to drink, but I think that just means we are more committed to helping people than others are. The fundraiser was for a 2 year old little girl who's been diagnosed with cancer. She had to have a lung removed. A lung! Removed! So it was really happy. Seriously her cousin told her friends about it, and they just kind of ran with it and put together this fundraiser, and it was really incredibly sweet and touching. Also it was a bachelor/bachelorette auction so now maybe you see why we chose to spend our time and money at this particular fundraiser. For those of you not familiar with a bachelor/bachelorette auction, let me explain. You buy people. For one night. Usually they come with a built in date-like a gift certificate to a restaurant and a box of condoms. Just kidding about the condoms. Probably.
All week leading up to it we jokingly talked about all the men we would purchase. Guess which one of us actually bought a man. If you guessed Steph, you a) are right and b) have obviously read this blog before. She got into a bidding war with a gay friend of ours, and there was no way she was going to lose. At one point I literally had to hold her back from all the smack-talking she was doing. She spent the next 20 minutes begging Meg and me to buy men so there could be some sort of double date. Awesome.
Now I admit, I did bid on a guy because we went to high school together and I wanted to help him out, but I did not win. However, watching Steph have to talk to the guy she just bought while I drank something called Peach Bellini Tini made me feel like a winner through and through.
After that we went to Lolita-owned by Chef Michael Symon-because they have happy hour from 5-6:30 and then from 9:30-close. 9:30-close happy hour! Greatest idea ever. Steph ordered some dessert for us to share called Chocolate Pot du Creme, and literally would not stop talking about how good it was. She kept saying things like, "You have never tasted anything this good." and "You won't be the same after this." Pretty bold claims. There was no way a tiny dessert could ever live up to that hype. So when it came I skeptically took a spoonful, and then...I was changed. Remember how in "The Wizard of Oz" the first part of the movie was in black and white and then she gets to Oz, and it's in color? I feel like my whole life before the dessert was in black and white then I ate it and suddenly I was in Technicolor. Seriously, you guys, if you are ever in Cleveland you must go to Lolita and get this dessert. I will go with you and order one myself-you know, for moral support.
Text message received March 6th, 2009 at 7:56am from Steph: "Remember that time I outbid a gay man at an auction to buy a man of my very own? That was weird, right?"
Not really, Steph. It's just your life.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Sold!
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6 comments:
I bet if i bought a man, I wouldnt have the issues i do now. however, it wasnt outlined, how long you get this man for.
and is it like buying dinner? does he *cough* "owe you?"
look i love all the charming gay men. love them to bits. but i am tired of them claiming all the hot men for themselves. everytime i meet a beautiful, lovely smelling man, he seems to be gay. i had to win this one as a matter of pride. they can't claim all the lovelies. i need one for myself and single women everyone. it was a proud proud thing i did, buying this man out from under my fierce competition.
Now i just need to let him know he will be doing my laundry and mopping my floor on my date. for the price i paid, it seems only fair. -Steph
I may be coming out to Cleveland in June for a company party, and I will definitely be going to Lolita for Heavenly Chocolate Goodness. And to the Winking Lizard, because I must have a t-shirt from there. Even if I have to rip it off a busboy's back.
Winking Lizard rules. It's so good. Wait...do you work for them?
No, I work for a company based in Cleveland, and I get the firmwide emails when they order lunch in, and sometimes it's from Winking Lizard. I'm intrigued because it sounds dirty.
Lolita rocks. Do they sell men there? Better not think to hard about it. Don't know if my husband will let me have a pet.
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