Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Five years

You guys, a grievous error has been made, and it must be rectified.

I missed the 5 year anniversary of this blog. On January 4, 2005 I started Okay Seriously. It was started as a way to help me pass the time during the long, depressing days after my boyfriend left. It has since become a place for me to make fun of celebrities, recap episodes of "Lost", tell stories that amuse me, embarass my friends and family, be a bad role model to kids and make connections with people I don't know because they care enough to be here and read my crap and not judge me (or at least judge me silently). Some of you have been with me for all 5 years (you know who you are, my special friends-looking forward to our 2010 meeting of the minds summit).

My blog was none too happy that I missed the blogiversary. I looked it up and for the 5th anniversary you are supposed to give something made of wood. I started out by trying to give my blog my coffee table:

















As you can see, that only started the waterworks. "You don't really care about me!" "You can't give me furniture you already own!" And on and on.

So then I thought, "Okay here's my 5 wood."

















The tears turned to anger. At this point I kind of threw my hands up in frustration. Words were exchanged. It got a little heated:

















Luckily I was able to defuse the situation by promising to post more often. Also I gave it $50 to go to the mall. It loves The Buckle.















In honor of my 5 year anniversary, how about some little known truths?

One thing that happened in my life that I never wrote about: 3 and a half years ago my dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer. At his request, I didn't blog about it while it was all happening. Yeah. I just blew your mind, didn't I? He is better now. You're never really cured of cancer once you get it, but he is officially considered a cancer survivor. Someday I'll write about it I'm sure, but it was always too big to put in to words for me. I'm not a true writer (see exhibit A: blog), and it was an important event and will continue to be important in the lives of me and my entire family and it's hard for me to write about it with any eloquence. Also my brain leads me to pee pee jokes because that's how I cope with things and that is inappropriate. But awesome sidenote: my dad still plays the cancer card sometimes. Like we'll be fighting over the last cookie and he'll say, "Well, I have cancer." I love you, Daddy. Sorry for all the jokes about my boobs over the past 5 years.

One thing I wrote about that never actually happened: I did not hook up with this guy in Miami:




















I'm sorry I lied to make myself look cool.

Aside from my maturity level, a lot has changed over the past 5 years. For example, my MS Paint skills. Also just look at how I've changed physically during that time:






I can't believe how dumb I used to look.

I actually thought about changing my blog template to be more "hip" in honor of the blogiversary, but let's be honest: I am way too lazy to do that. I mean we are talking about a girl who owns 3 pairs of slip on tennis shoes just so she can leave the house without bending over to tie her shoes. It's lucky I even have the energy to log on and type.

I just want to express my sincerest, from-the-heart thanks to everyone who has spent any time here on this blog. Having this outlet has meant so much to me over the years. The fact that people read this and sometimes even enjoy it baffles me, flatters me and feeds my already over-inflated ego, making me unbearable to the people who have to deal with me in person. So thank you. I love you all. We should all get together and drink so much vodka that we are too embarassed to look each other in the eyes the next morning.

Love,
Sarah
BFF
95 Tops
K.I.T.

P.S. Yes that's my Christmas tree in the background of the pictures up there. You are fine.

P.P.S. Um...Lost premiere in 6 days.

P.P.P.S. I love that the "face of my blog" in these pictures has a picture of a clay elephant I made at age 33. That is so fitting.

15 comments:

Carrie said...

Happy anniversary! I just stumbled upon your blog a couple of weeks ago and love it! And SOOOOO excited about LOST!

Johnny Virgil said...

Happy year five! Is your blog still working at that strip club?

Anonymous said...

Writing comes easy to you. And the vodka party, I am definitely on :)

Nessa Happens said...

I adore you, OKSS! And not in a creepy way. In a totally normal, girl on girl platonic kind of way.

Also, every time I see Evangeline Lilly on a freaking hair dye commercial I turn away and mutter, "I hate you. You've slept with both Sawyer and Jack."

I mean, I know they're just characters, and that for real she hooked up with Charlie and that's just weird because although I love him, he's a shrimply little britget (british midget), but it doesn't matter because my eyeballs have seen her suck face with them both, and I will believe my eyeballs over my brain any day.

Happy 5th!

S.Rod said...

Allow me to make you a little more unbearable to people who know you: Happy anniversary from another Sarah! I stumbled on Okay Seriously either through 15 Minute Lunch or Midwestgrrl (both of which I also stumbled upon randomly, weird right?) a couple of years ago and find you hilarious. Keep drinking and writing about what happens!

Katie said...

I found your blog a couple of years ago and read back through the whole thing because you're hilarious. Keep blogging for another five!

thb said...

hahahahaha! that was frickin hilarious!

Fizzgig said...

i can hardly stand the wait until lost returns. its mixed. because i soooo dont want it to end.

texang said...

Happy Anni! I have been following you for about year and it's been fun! You almost make me want to visit Ohio... almost. :-)

Amy said...

I've been reading for quite a while and love your blog! Congratulations :)

Also: LOST!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Please keep going for many years to come! And despite your facial changes you still use that same lipstick, the color which your refuse to share with me!

Unknown said...

Happy 5th Blogiversary! I'm so excited for the Blog Meet-Up this year!

And HOLY CRAP am I excited for Lost. For real. Brian's kinda tired of me saying that.

Diane said...

Happy Anniversary! Please keep this going...I LOVE reading it, except for when you make fun of me.

John said...

I couldn't tell that was an elephant. I thought your blog was "getting wood" for the 5 year anniversary.

spaceface01 said...

You crack me up! Happy Anniversary!