Running down a dream

The Lost recap isn't complete. I have to go back and watch a few scenes and haven't been home to do that. Well technically I was home last night, but obviously I was watching the amazing 24 finale (I love you, Secret Service Aaron). Sunday I was home for part of the day, but I did a 10k in the morning and went to a child's birthday party for the afternoon so when I got home, all I wanted to do was melt into my bed and sleep for 24 hours. Which is basically what I did.

I know some of you are still stuck on the 10k part of that last paragraph. 'But, Sarah,' you are saying. 'You're a lazy piece. What were you doing at a 10k?' It's a valid question. So as we all know, I'm a chubby bubby. I will always be a chubby bubby, but I would like a little less chubby to go with the bubby so one of the things we're doing is entering a bunch of races this season. Now let's be honest here: I don't race. Or run. It's just not part of who I am. If I suddenly became a runner, it would cause a cataclysmic event wherein the earth would spin off its axis and go careening into the sun which would then cause our galaxy to collapse in on itself. What-it could happen. You don't need to look it up-I saw "The Black Hole" when I was 5. That basically makes me a scientist.

The point is, I don't really run. What we do is called Run/Walk. You can't really tell from the name, but basically it's a combination of running and walking. Here is how it works:

1. We walk.
2. Diane says, "Okay up there at that tree, start running. I will tell you when you can stop."
3. We run and cry and beg Diane to let us stop after about 10 feet.
4. Diane says no.
5. We stop when she says we can.
6. We tell Diane we hate her.

Diane and I do this when we go to the gym-which is every single day. Do you hear that noise? That's God laughing. Okay when we get the chance to go to the gym, we do it. We recently brought Renee into our little Run/Walk club. We did a 5k two weeks ago which my Dad helped to put together then did not participate in because he had to go play golf. Awesome. So Sunday was the Cleveland Marathon and besides the 26 mile death run, they have a half marathon and a 10k race. Christy, Meg and Lisa did the half marathon because they are completely insane. Diane, Renee, Brigid and I did the 10k.

I've done the 10k before-six years ago. I had no concept of how far 10 kilometers was, but I figured it couldn't be that far. We prepared for the race by getting completely shitfaced the night before and staying out till 2am. We were so hungover the next morning, I really thought I might fall down. About 15 minutes into the race two things happened, one of which is TMI for you but you are fine:

1. We all realized we had to go to the bathroom. Bad. Like worse than we've ever had to go to the bathroom in our lives. And I don't mean #1, y'all.

2. This conversation happened:

Me: "So how far is a 10k anyway? Like 2 miles?"
Stupid boy we hate now: "6.2 miles."
Me: silently blinking for about 10 seconds
Stupid boy: blinking back at me
Me: "SIX POINT TWO MILES!?!? ARE YOU EFFING KIDDING ME?!?"

Let this be a lesson to all kids out there: This is what happens to you when you don't remember basic math principles like converting kilometers to miles. You end up stupid and in a 6 mile race while hungover and having to make a deposit at your local toilet bank.

This Sunday went much better as I was more prepared both physically and math-wise. We introduced Brigid to the Run/Walk club, and she enjoyed it. I consider myself successful because a) I finished, b) I didn't come in last and c) I wasn't a complete and utter whiny bitch. Even though I was really tired and sore, it felt good to do something healthy and good for my body. We celebrated by immediately going to a diner and stuffing ourselves with greasy breakfast food. That also felt good. I like eating.