Tuesday, March 23, 2010

So March. So Mad.

As quickly as it begins, it ends. Every year, March Madness. Every year you make me so happy and then so mad. And soooo much more unproductive at work (I love you, espn.com with real time scoreboard updates.) And every year I still come back for more because I need you in my life. Here is my 2010 entry into the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament Poetry Hall of Fame. An upfront warning: perhaps not my best work as this was hastily-and angrily-written. Because ho. ly. shit.

"We're not in Kansas anymore. And by 'we' I mean people who win things." by Okay Seriously

Saturday night I sat without care
Not worried about how my teams would fair.

After all, at this point we were only three days in.
Surely there was still a chance I could win.

Then Kansas was like, "Hey you know what'd be sweet?
If we ruined Sarah's life and got ourselves beat.

It's not like she chose us to come in first place.
I'm sure she'll handle this loss with true grace."

Listen I am a lady and handle things with class.
That being said…SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!

Day 3? Are you serious? Day 3 and I'm out?
I hate you, Kansas. Without a doubt.

You come in here like, "Hey we're number one!"
Then Northern Iowa's like, "Yeah no you're done."

How can I put in to words how much you suck?
To quote my friend John: "Fucking Kansas. FUCK."

As punishment you'll listen to my angry rambling.
What do you mean I have a problem with gambling?

Everyone cross your fingers that my second bracket keeps going. If Syracuse loses, I am holding John personally responsible, and a second poem WILL be written and John WILL be the lead character. Last year's poem is here.


Johnny Virgil said...

You should write children's books. That was awesome.

Idea #527 said...

I actually had Kansas in the Final Four and not winning, but I cheered the heck out of Northern Iowa because I literally hate Bill Self that much for leaving IL when he said he wouldn't. To my face. Personally.

Idea #527 said...

On a side note, my last word verification was "darno". haha!

Fizzgig said...

i rarely run across a sports fan that is happy with their sport. it seems to stress people out.

if i could see the future and make money off sports id be all over it!

good luck!

Dana said...

Waiting on that 2nd poem... I had Syracuse. :sob:

John said...

this was top notch. Although I don't know why you hold me responsible for anything. It's not like you consulted me when you were filling out your bracket.