Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Still drinking

Saturday we stopped in on a weekend-long celebration happening in the Flats. The Harbor Inn was celebrating its 40th anniversary with a block party called Wally World. Wally is the owner of the bar. There was live music, drinks, games, food and more drinks. And Wally wearing a giant crown the entire weekend. Our plan was to go to Wally World for a couple hours and then head up to a pub crawl downtown. Sidenote: I have done more pub crawls in the past 3 years than I ever even did in college. I thought things were supposed to die down when you got past 30?

We decided to take it easy at Wally World so we could last through the pub crawl. Fifteen minutes later we were each a full drink and 2 jello shots in. And we were like, "Oh okay so it's one of those nights." I'm blaming part of our inability to control our drinking on the greatest band ever: Cruisin'. Just look at that guy. That's Ron Howard, the founder of the band. He is glorious. Seriously peruse their songlist. It's amazing. Soft rock, Motown-awesome.

No one was really dancing, but since we had drank (drunk?) about 20 of these in addition to lots of vodka and/or beer, we couldn't sit still any longer. Especially with Cruisin' playing. Seriously I can't say enough about this band. Anyway, we started dancing, and listen I don't want to brag or anything, but seriously as soon as we started dancing, everyone else started, too. That might be our only talent: looking so unbelievably stupid that we actually instill the confidence in others necessary for them to get up and dance.

To our dismay, Cruisin' had to take a break. However, Steph and I used that as our chance to meet the band. We walked up to the drummer and asked them where they usually played. He said, "Oh Ron has schedules. I'll make sure you get one!" As we walked away, we had this conversation:

Me: Oh my God we're best friends.
Steph: Remember that time they asked us to be in the band?
Me: Remember how they asked us to tour with them?
Steph: And we were like, 'Give us your schedule, and we'll see if we can fit it in.'?

Yeah. Zero to crazy in under 30 seconds. That's how fast we get there.

A couple minutes later, Ron Howard, the lead singer and founder, walked over and gave us business cards and told us to check out the web site. And told us we were best friends (I'm not letting go of that.) Later Steph was in line for the bathroom, and she started a conversation with the girl next to her about the band. Steph started telling the girl that we were pretty good friends with them, and showed the girl Ron Howard's business card. At that point, the girl completely lost her mind laughing. She actually was with the band. Like for real. Dammit.

Once Cruisin' was done playing, we decided we no longer needed to be there. Life was just not as bright without them. So we headed to our pub crawl already so drunk that we called Woody and literally threatened his life/face if he didn't come meet us out. Incidentally, he didn't and none of us noticed. It says nothing about our feelings for Woody. It says everything about how messy we were.

The pub crawl portion of the night is rather hazy for me. What I know is that we didn't last long, I hung up on my sister because "Sugar" by Flo Rida came on and I "had to dance", I stole a Blo Pop from a bathroom attendant lady, Christy doesn't remember eating a full meal, I took a cab like 15 miles further than I was originally going to and Christy lost her wallet.

On Sunday, you guys will be happy to know that I got back on the horse, er, bike. I haven't ridden Lucky since "the incident". Not because I was scared, but because my knee hurt so bad. It's still in a lot of pain, but it's manageable, and I missed my Lucky so I thought it was time. I am happy to report, I did not fall off. I did not attempt to go up any 1.5" curbs out of concern for my life/pride. However, that changed tonight. Tonight I took on two of my greatest bike enemies: the 1.5" curb and getting the mail. Both have been defeated, each sent home a dejected loser. You know, I really shouldn't mock them. Lord knows they could each easily take me out again. I picture them each as Dr. Claw, sitting in their chair stroking their evil cat saying, "I'll get you next time, Okay Seriously!" I'm a pretty normal person.

Also on Sunday, Steph and Meg went strawberry picking. Obviously. I texted Steph later in the day asking how it went, and she said she was going to make me jam. A few hours later, I received this text: "Just caused kitchen fire. Dont put paper plates in microwave! Dammit. Making jam is hard! And dangerous." What Steph doesn't know is that I did not realize that paper plates could catch on fire in a microwave so she has actually saved my life without knowing it. Thanks, Steph (cue "The More You Know" jingle here.)

Final note: My family sang the National Anthem at the Indians game last night like we do every year for the past few years. In the middle, the camera guy for the Jumbotron had the camera trained on us from like 2 feet away. It was on us for so long and made me so uncomfortable that as soon as he turned it off, I started laughing. Then Diane laughed. Then I literally couldn't stop. I had the full blown giggles. In the middle of singing the National Anthem. I just thought you'd all like to know that my previous fears have been realized: I am an actual national disgrace. I apologize. If it helps at all, you should know that in 8th grade I wore an American flag t-shirt almost every other day that I bought at Wearhouse of Fashions for like $3.99. And I totally tucked it in in the front but not in the back. God Bless the USA.


shine said...

Okay, can I please come hang out in Cleveland? I promise to be drunk!

These things you describe are the exact kinds of things I get myself into on a regular basis.

Fizzgig said...

heyyyy we were going to go to wally world, but opted for the irish festival at riverfront (thats in akron for you big city folk) instead.

if i was there, id have been the bands best friend.

I like a challenge......=)

Erratic said...

I had a weekend like this not too long boyfriend lost his iPhone and I woke up the next morning only to realize someone had signed my shirt. They were not, in fact, famous. I was just that drunk.

Jesslyn said...

Ditto on what Shine said.

You may have two strangers searching the bars in Cleveland for you and your friends.