Thursday, August 02, 2007

I have writer's block

I just found this picture on my camera:














This is the couch my grandparents' had in their living room for 20 or 30 years. I call it the Sex Couch because it's so obviously a prop from a cheesy 1970's porn. It's currently in my sister's basement. My grandma was so disappointed that Diane didn't put it in the living room. I wonder how disappointed she would be if she knew I called it the Sex Couch.

Listen up, Clevelanders! Saturday is the Krusty's Summer Sauce Camp party. You may remember me talking about this last year. It's an all day party that benefits charity. It's all you can eat and drink and was basically the greatest day of my whole life. Go out and get your tickets so you can join in the mayhem.

Speaking of the Krusty party, check this out. Somehow the event coordinator for it found my blog post about last year's party and commented on it. I emailed him and guess what? Okay Seriously is currently on the VIP list and will be getting in for free! Holy shit! Having a blog finally paid off! Does this mean I am a celebrity? I think so. I must turn into an asshole at once. I will begin by going to a charity event and not paying to get in so that the charity doesn't get my money. I will follow that up with rehab and possibly a sex tape. Here's a preview:














P.S. Wow "The View" is really taking a chance breaking form and hiring a man.

P.P.S. If you listen closely to the lyrics of the chorus to "Don't Cry Out Loud" by Melissa Manchester, she's really not giving very sound advice.

11 comments:

Carly said...

At least they didn't hire someone like Carrot Top. He terrifies me - have you seen his bad plastic surgery? Although he would blend well with the couch you're showing us here...

Skeezix said...

Carrot Top is scary, that is plastic surgery gone very, very, very wrong.


Is the gold sex couch courderoy?

The Middle Child said...

Wow, it does look like a sex couch. Actually it looks like a sex then nap couch cause it looks like a good stretch out and sleep on it couch..... but of course not until the stick figures are done having sex on it.

Sassy Blondie said...

My grandmother had the same couch...only it was in green. I think my aunt has it somewhere in her basement. Of course, now it's known as "vintage", which is just a fancy word for tired old shit.

Congrats on your VIP status!

CruiserMel said...

I think the word is superstar! Congrats.

ThatGirl7278 said...

That is wrong, girl. I like Whoopi. Or is it Whoop-eeeeee?

Oh, and congrats on the VIP! That is pretty effin' cool.

Idea #527 said...

It's strange how much my life sometimes parallels yours. . . I feel like I'm quasi stalking you however we live no where near eachother. I too this weekend am doing a benefit thing for a children's home. However mine is a kickball tournament that starts at 8am with a lot of drinking to be consumed throughout the day. And the crazy thing was the guy remembered our actual kickball team from the league last fall when we signed up last night.

Congrats on the VIP!!

Violet said...

That's an awesome couch!!

"AG" said...

"Don't cry out loud" is in my head all weekend for certain now, including the instrumentals at the end. This WILL make me cry out loud, because you are right, the message is wrong.

Mon said...

I'm pretty ticked I dont get to go to that benefit. How awesome that you get to go for free. I think it does mean you are a celebrity too. Lucky. I'll look for you on TMZ Monday morning!

I'm prety pissed about The View. First I was pissed when they hired Rosie, then I loved her, then she left, now it sucks. I'm not happy about the new host/hostess/whatever either.

P.S. That couch is in pretty good shape. All it needs is a slip cover. Don't I sound grown up?

Alan the Great said...

What a coincidence, I just wrote a sex-related post myself. More nerd porn related, really.

So if that's a sex-couch, do you really want to think about what both your grandparents and your sister have been doing on it?