Monday, April 03, 2006

I heart muscle relaxers

Sorry for the drunk post on Saturday, folks. Gordon and Danielle forced me to do it. And Sharda sat by me the whole time and fixed my spelling mistakes. It was totally not annoying to be in the middle of typing and then have her hit the Backspace key every 5 seconds.

On Saturday we had our first football game of the spring season. Since I'm a superjock (jock means alcoholic, right?), I felt I had to make an impression. And I did. On some guy's face. This guy and I were running really fast at each other (okay he was running fast-I was attempting to run but probably looked like I was jogging in place), and we ran into each other full force and smacked heads. His eye socket, my cheek. I was instantly dizzy, had an instant headache and instantly started crying. I had to go down to my knees until I could see again and get through the worst of it. And what about him, you ask? Oh he was fine. He was like, "We knocked heads. I banged my eye socket." Then he kept playing. It definitely didn't make me feel like I was being a baby. After a few minutes I went back in-once when I wasn't supposed to. I blamed it on the head injury.

Two days later, it looks like I am the victim of domestic violence. The left side of my face is bruised and cut. When people notice it and ask me what happened I just say, "[Insert name of someone nearby] hits me when I talk back." As of this morning my upper back is spasming to the point where I can't lift my head up. So currently I am covered in Icy Hot and high on muscle relaxers. Take a number, gentlemen. I am as hot as they come. Or should I say, Icy Hot.

I want to talk about Grey's, but my head is fuzzy, and my fingers are no longer responding very well to my brain commands. I will say 2 things, though, that I need to get off my chest:

1. The Izzie and Denny storyline has got to go. It is creepy beyond belief. That relationship is so inappropriate. She didn't just cross the line. She destroyed the line and then laughed at its sad dead line corpse while she flipped it the bird. It looks like they might address that next week with Bailey being the one calling her out thank goodness. It's about time. Also, literally everything Denny talks about is how hot Izzie is or how he wants to get in her pants. They have never had a conversation about anything else ever. Creepy. And if he's so great and charming, how come no one ever comes to visit him?? Huh??? Maybe because he is a dirty perv.

2. Chris O'Donnell!!!! Fantastic surprise, Grey's. It's about time O'Donnell was back in the game. He's quite yummy.

Okay if I don't stop typing now, this is going to turn into another drunk/high post, and no one wants that. Peace out motherbitches.


John said...

I'm totally first so the rest of you assfaces can bite the baloney wagon.

russ said...


"AG" said...

You are so cool for having a football injury! Do recover soon!

sharda said...

hey, you should be grateful I spell checked your blog so well.... did you see danielle's? she didn't have my help and look how hers turned out.

slcup said...

We need to be on a conference call during GA, no? This way we can discuss during commercial breaks.

Carly said...

damn.... feel better soon!

Nessa said...

What you need is some more fresh-from-the-shower Jack to pick you up. Literally. If not actually picking you up, at least prancing about on the television. Quite frankly, I could use that too.

I'll contact the network - let's make this happen.

Oh, that girl. said...

I love the relationship with Izzie and Denny. I think its wonderful! Pooh on you for that. I am so glad she ditched alex. he is an ass, but I love what he said to Burke at the end. Bravo! I am sorry that you have a black eye, but I will tell you this joke to make you feel better:

Q: What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?
A: Nothing you haven't already told her twice.