Friday, November 16, 2007

No. Effing. Way.

Do you guys want to hear something awesome? Then you should probably go read another blog. You are not going to believe what happened to me.

I left work yesterday at the peak of rush hour and drove John to his car. Then we both got on the highway. I merged onto the highway then went to change lanes. As I was getting over, I looked behind me to make sure I had room. When I turned back around, the girl in front of me was at a dead stop. And I think you can guess what happened next. I was going roughly 45-50 mph just like everyone else on the highway except the girl in front of me. Apparently there were pieces of a bumper on the road and instead of going around it like every single other car she just stopped.

I ran into the girl, and the guy behind me ran into me. It was so awesome! We got out to assess the damage-of which there was very little-and the dude and I were ready to exchange info and leave, but the girl was already on the phone with the police. I don't blame her-if I was the car in front I'd call, too. But I was annoyed because I just wanted to go home. Oh and did I mention it was hailing? Yes. It only added to the enjoyment.

In the meantime John called me. He was 2 cars in front of me. He was like, "That wasn't you, was it?". When I told him it was he said, "Oh man-I went around the bumper, looked in my rearview mirror, saw the person behind me just completely lock up her brakes and thought 'Oh boy-this is not going to be good'."

As I was sitting there it dawned on me that half the people I work with were probably driving by. It couldn't get worse, right? Wrong. After a few minutes of talking to my dad, both of us almost positive there was no way a Cleveland cop was going to show up in less than 2 hours, I saw a firetruck and ambulance coming the opposite way of the highway. I made a joke, "Hey, Dad, maybe those are coming here.". We had a good laugh as I watched the emergency vehicles drive on by. Two minutes later the firetruck and ambulance pulled up behind us blocking our lane and the lane to our right-where basically everyone in Cleveland was trying to get on the highway.

At this point I was trying to sink as far down into my seat as humanly possible. And I put on my hood thinking it would help me to become invisible.

The firemen and paramedics, once they realized we were all okay, were visibly annoyed. I heard one of them say in an agitated voice, "There's like barely any damage.". I do not blame them. All I kept thinking about was what in the hell did this girl say to 911 when she called in this accident to cause them to send an ambulance and a firetruck?

One of the firemen came up and said, "Are you guys just going to exchange info and leave?". I told him if he could get the others to agree with that then I was in. He told us he thought that's what we should do then we had to stand out in the hail and write all our shit down. Finally when we were done they told us to get over to the right lane since they had it blocked off, build up our speed and merge into traffic.

I let the girl go, gave her some room then I went. I got up to about 50mph and the girl fucking slammed on her brakes again! We suddenly were at 25mph, and I was like are you effing kidding me? Luckily this time I avoided an accident, and I got over since obviously this chick was trying to kill me.

Right as I was on my way, my parents called. "You're on the news". Yes. We were on the news. They were talking about this 3 car pile up on the highway, emergency services on the scene, etc. Good Lord.

That's 3 accidents this year that I've been involved in either directly or indirectly. I think I shall dub 2007 "The Year of the Accident". I am ready for The Year of the Accident to give way to The Year I Win Millions in the Lottery...And I Marry John Krasinski.

12 comments:

CruiserMel said...

You know, there are better reasons to get on the news than causing a traffic jam. Perhaps winning the lottery would be a better idea, newswise.

Glad you're all right. That could've been pretty bad actually.

Skeezix said...

Goddamn, I would have been so pissed at the girl for stopping dead on the freeway. WHO DOES THAT?

And then to slam on your brakes a second time? WTF?

I'm glad you are ok though.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you are alright, but you have been accident prone since you got your license. Remeber bribbing my brother and Becker? How awesome was that? Or the cat that ran in front of the car ;) at Mike's.

Oh I miss those days!!!!!

Violet said...

Wow, I'm so glad you're ok! Hope psycho chick stays home today. But on the bright side - there's your fifteen minutes of fame for the year! :)

ThatGirl7278 said...

Hey, that's what I dubbed 2006!

2007 was supposed to be my own, "The Year I Win Millions in the Lottery...And I Marry John Krasinski." but alas no such luck. But hey, I still have another month or so!

Nikol said...

That was you? I was cursing you to hell yesterday, just thought you should know. I was inching by right after the emergency vehicles passed me and BLOCKED TWO LANES. And as I passed and saw that NO ONE WAS HURT (thank God) AND THERE WAS NO DAMAGE TO THE CARS I thought about driving in to all of you at once just to make the scene not a total waste of everyone's time. Totally not your fault, I understand, but I felt compelled to vent on your blog anyway ;)

I feel much better now, thanks.

Niki (I used to work with your mom)

P.S. I am a chronic lurker and I love your blog. Thanks for writing.

Sarah said...

Nikol! OMG I'm so sorry! Believe me I tried to get the girl to take my info and leave so we could get off the road, but she had already called the police. It was so embarassing.

Carly said...

if you marry him I am soo00o going to sleep with your husband

http://www.menshealth.com/cda/article.do?site=MensHealth&channel=guy.wisdom&category=career.money&conitem=7a92df7f26c46110VgnVCM20000012281eac____&page=1

Carly said...

PS: that link didn't work right. I'll send it to or something.

Sassy Blondie said...

Damn, Sarah! Your insurance must be killing you now!

I'm glad you're all right. Be careful out there!

Mon said...

Daaang! Glad you are ok but damn! Friday was a nasty night to be out in the freezing cold!

But, eh, freaking awesome to be on the news....local celebrity and all.

Orhan Kahn said...

It was so awesome!

Okay, never getting into a car with you. Truth!