Hit Me Baby One More Time: Week 5

Yes, folks, I finally got to watch it again. This week's was the season finale, and I have to say-it sort of ended on a flop. The artists they got were mostly substandard. That doesn't mean there isn't anything to say because I am Sarah, and there is always stuff to say. (By the way, John will be burning episodes 3 and 4 to DVD for me so reviews are forthcoming.)

My comments:

Juice Newton - After all this time I still think your name is funny. You have aged well, and you sound pretty good, too. "Queen of Hearts" is an awesome song. And you actually sounded okay on Ashlee Simpson. Plus you still play the guitar, and chicks who play guitar are awesome. Be careful of that haircut. It's borderline 80's.

Animotion - I never realized that the song "Obsession" was so boring. Oh wait-yes I did, and that's why I could never listen to it without wanting to jab a pen in my ears. I felt that way again last night which I guess means you guys still got it. Lead singer guy, it was weird when then showed you doing graphic design with your sons, and you were wearing an argile sweater. If you're in a band called Animotion, are you allowed to wear argile? Maybe take some tips from Elvira there. She seems to be completely unable to let go of the 80's. You sang "Days Go By" by Dirty Vegas. What the hell were you thinking. That is a horrible, horrible song. Do you not want to make a comeback or something? There's no other explanation for why you chose that song. Shame on you.

Shannon - Who the hell are you. The highlight of both of your performances was when the host said that your first song made him "want to do robotics" and then he did The Robot.

PM Dawn - Um, you guys are awesome. I was obsessed with you in high school, and not much has changed. Lead singer, at first I thought you had lost one of your chins, but then I noticed that it had just slipped down to your neck. "Set Adrift on Memory Bliss" sounded exactly the same, and "Blurry" by Puddle of Mudd was totally PM Dawned out, and it was fantastic. You absolutely deserved to win, and I am not just saying that because Dave L. told me in 10th grade that "I'd Die Without You" reminded him of me. Also you deserve to win because you totally laid it on thick:
1 – handing out flowers to the audience in an obvious bid to win votes
2 – starting off "Set Adrift" by saying "I'd like to say 'What's up' to God." I like the appeal to the Big Man, and I'm pretty sure God says "What's up" back.
Bonus points: When Lead Singer said his goal is to be a successful vegetarian. At least I think that's what he said, but he doesn't really use consonants so I don't know.

Missing Persons - My comments for you are the same for the past as they are for the present: No. Just no.

Host – God love ya, you actually semi won me over. I think it was The Robot that sent me over the edge. You big freak.