Today is B's birthday so I pretty much hate everything. I wrote a song in his honor:
Happy Birthday-eff you!
Happy Birthday-eff you!
You look like someone who used to live here,
And you smell like one, too.
I am not that creative. Dammit does anyone have any vodka?
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7 comments:
I say look at it this way...since you don't have to buy him birthday presents you can go buy yourself a house instead. I think its a good alternative. I say go buy stuff for your house tonight. (Maybe vodka could be a legitimate purchase...no house warming party is complete without vodka.)
or get yourself a puppy.
No wait, check that - turns out they poop a ton.
Go with nickel knobs instead...
How about a limerick?
"There once was a B from Nantucket..."
"...who could make me puke in a bucket...he's such a big jerk, his whole life needs some work, so to hell with B from Nantucket...."
...it's weak, but it's late!!
I vote to redecorate a room in your new house and call 3/14 Independence Day from now on. We don't neeeeed no steeenking men... unless they're Johnny Virgil of course. (Do you know he wears flannel shirts to work?)
Well, TECHNICALLY it is made of a flannel-like material, but isn't your typical lumberjack-lookin' flannel shirt. It's more akin to your basic flannel PJ's. Yeah. That's right. I said "akin."
Oh oh. Carly's in her man-hatin mood. I'm glad my name's not Craig.
It's COE time... we'll be duking it out next week. Start a pool. I take Wednesday.
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