Tuesday, March 29, 2005


I got on the elevator this morning to go downstairs and buy breakfast (Sprees), and another girl got on with me. When we got off the elevator at the first floor, I noticed she was going outside to have a smoke. It was 8:30am. 8:30 in the morning, people! What could possibly have happened in the first 30 minutes of work that she had to have a cigarette? "The fax machine didn't give me a confirmation document! Why?? WHY???????" (heavy sobbing) "Goddammit I need a cigarette."

I mean if this girl is going at 8:30am, chances are she will go at least once an hour for the rest of the day. And each break will probably last at least 7 minutes. That's 8 breaks x 7 minutes each = 56 minutes. That's almost an hour worth of breaks that us non-smokers are not taking. I think I have just justified the amount of time I spend on blogging and reading others' blogs. I will save this information to provide to my boss when he catches me reading John's 3lb poop theory.

P.S. Here's another reason why my dad is awesome. He smoked for 30 years, and then on December 19th, 2003 he quit cold turkey. He hasn't smoked since. Kick ass much, Dad?


ORF said...

So I just found your blog this morning and was all excited to write to you to tell you that I enjoyed reading it and that you should read mine too because we use the same blogger template and because my roommate is from CLE (Heights! I've never actually been, but I consider it worth representin') and I too witnessed someone smoking a cigarette at 8:30 this morning and considered blogging about it and so we're sort of related in a Kevin Bacon kind of way but then I found this post http://okayseriously.blogspot.com/2005/01/politics-shmolitics.html#comments and discovered that you're not so much into the politicking and sadly, my last couple of posts have been somewhat strident on that front, but while they DO use big words, they disparage people who deserve it and there are also often nuggets of hilarity buried deep inside if you look for them and so yes, in fact, you SHOULD read my blog because I now plan to visit yours regularly. And, I wrote a post about poop recently (which I think you WILL like) which is actually quite out of character for me, but I'm finding that my online platform is affording me new means of exploring my personality in a safe, non-threatening way.
In short: nice to find someone on blogger that's above the dross.

slcup said...

Holy run-on sentence, ohreally factor!

Golightly said...

3 lb poop had me LMAO!

Smokers here take 20 minutes each time time they go out for a smoke and I think they go every 1.5 hours; then my boss wants to always stress how important it is that we get to work on time for our shifts and when we come back from lunch and breaks--WTF?

We should get blogger breaks.

danielle said...

hey, i think we should get out at noon on fridays due to this non-smoking thing we're part of. also, the blogging is like something they're lucky to have us doing for no extra charge.

Oh, that girl. said...

I am a smoker, but I only take two smoke breaks a day, (not coutning lunch). My breaks take all of 10 minutes and I include a trip to the bathroom as well. I think they just need something better to do.

Anonymous said...

I quit smoking over five years ago! Yay me.

Still trying to get my father to quit. Congrats to yours!

Sarah said...

Congrats, AG! That's fantastic!

ORF said...

eh, I do what I can. Actually, I think someone just slipped me some caffeine yesterday. Result: I am a chihuahua. good times.

Sarah said...

It's all good, Ohreally. I laughed. At first I thought maybe you were making fun of me because you said my blog is above the dross, and I think my blog is the most useless blog on earth. I was like-is she being sarcastic and making fun of me? But now that you are back I'm glad to see you weren't. :)

P.S. I had to look up the word "dross".