Monday, January 31, 2005

Mental Health Day

So I took the day off today. I needed a "mental health" day, and while mental health was not achieved, I did hear "The Right Stuff" on the radio. I think we should bring back the New Kids. I miss them. I miss the sweet jams and the hip dance moves (i.e., hold on to your belt and swing legs side to side). I miss hearing my guy friends call them gay and then secretly sing along to "Hangin' Tough". I need more of Donnie Wahlberg singing and wearing a hat that says "Hardware" and less of him being a serious actor.

I'm sleepy so I need to cut this short and make this post suck more than they usually do. But I, of course, would like to address a few Bachelorette issues:

1. The quality of my life, nay, of all our lives is improved with the departing of the goddamn Frenchman. Good riddance. You are annoying. You are an a-hole. You are a pansy. And your accent sucks.

2. I can't believe she got rid of Ben. Apparently she isn't into really nice genuine guys. No he wasn't the hottest, but he was sweet, and I have a feeling he might have been funny--a quality that almost all of these guys so far are severely lacking.

3. Something else lacking on Jerry is inflection. Two words, Jer: voice modulation. Unless your goal is to make my ears bleed. If that's the case, keep up the good work. Oh and something else you might want to consider: smiling. I know it's hard when you are busy brooding, but give it a shot. Hopefully your face won't crack.

4. Seriously, Jen, you are testing my patience with John Paul. He doesn't wear socks with his BOAT SHOES, Jen!!!!! How can that not mean anything to you???

8 comments:

Erik with a K said...

I have no idea what you're talking about, but I'm just really glad you had a new post. I think I read every other blog while you were off the air. And there's a lot of blogs.

Please make the next one about furry butts or music you can freak to :-)

Tigerlily said...

AAAAAAahahahaha, I posted similar rage about John Paul. I think Jen is a droid.

danielle said...

it's about damn time erik used furry butts again.

i don't know what's going on with jen. she must know that she wants jer-man, mr. wendell, or ryan for sure and didn't have any more time or energy for cute little ben. it was probably a toss up between ben and john paul. jerry's definitely showing signs of weird though. hot, but weird.

mental health days are the greatest.

Anonymous said...

Jerry's dancing... where do I start? Oy vey

~Carly

Anonymous said...

Diane: Is it just me, or does Jerry look like he's dipping many times. His bottom lip sticks out. If I were jen, I'd be all about him at first and then I think I would get bored. I'm voting for Ryan.

sara said...

i'm glad i'm not the only one who misses the new kids...joey's curly locks overflowing out the top of his hat. nobody cuts the tops off their hats anymore. so sad. and forget donnie's hardware hat, it was all about the underwear on the head. i mean seriously!

i use to pretend joe was singing to me when his prepubescent pipes belted out "you're my popsicle!"

ah to be 12 again. 12 and in love with 5 slightly homosexual pop stars. those were the days weren't they?

Sarah said...

OMG, Sara, for a minute I didn't know if I had written that comment or not. Welcome to my blog. You're my new best friend.

John said...

Jeez talk about us being all about the new Sarah miss "You're my new best friend."